Why we will win: a brief recap
We will win because:
Their women in oppression and fear. Our women are free and joyous.
Their society produces no weapons that can possibly harm us. They are reduced to stealing our own tools to use against us.
They believe all wisdom comes from a single book, and pleasure is weakness. We have a national anthem based on a song about drinking and sex.
Our civilians defeated their trained killers in 109 minutes.
Indeed, we should pity them.